Showing posts with label Jon Pardi. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jon Pardi. Show all posts

Sep 20, 2019

3 Up, 3 Down


3 Up

Jon Pardi - Heartache Medication
It’s hard to believe a song that starts out with a fiddle is actually a hit in this day and age. Pardi’s country, this song is country, what more do you need to know? It’s not exactly groundbreaking in the lyrical department, but it’s well written and at least copies all the good stuff. I’m really looking forward to his new album. Aside from “Heartache on the Dance Floor,” I’ve liked all Jon’s songs so far.
B+

Runaway June - Buy My Own Drinks
What’s this? Women with a top 10 song? I’m sure some IHeartRadio analyst somewhere is counting this as 3 songs by women for their stats, since Runaway June has 3 members. The song: it’s propulsive, confident, and catchy. It’s also timely. I hope radio will give this group a fair shake on future singles as well; their underrated Blue Roses album has quite a few that deserve airplay. 
B+

Lady Antebellum - What If I Never Get Over You
Shut up. I know it’s not very country, and Lady Antebellum is usually reality-show scripted kiss background music at best, but this is pretty good …so leave me alone. It calls back to their early swoony ballads, and for me that’s not a bad thing. Lady A got off the rails a few years ago with unmemorable …uh, songs… I don’t even recall any of them enough to give a fair description, but this seems to be a pointed turn back to what they do best. And it’s a sad song! And there are real instruments! The bar is low these days, what can I say? The harmonies are beautiful though.
B


3 Down

Chris Lane - I Don’t Know About You
It starts out bad and gets indescribably worse almost immediately. Heavy beats, R&B copycat vocal style, modern slang-y lyrics …but this is (air quotes) country y’all. While I listened to this to write a few words about it, I kept checking over my should to make sure nobody thought I was listening for my enjoyment. The chorus has lyrics nearly identical to several other pop-country songs, as I illustrated in a meme last month. Come to think of it, “country” songs are basically just memes now. Take a format and make slight changes to it and pass it around. As Public Enemy once poignantly asked “Who stole the soul?”
F

Jimmie Allen - Make Me Want To
Jimmie has some talent, and at least a smidgen of promise. However, this song fulfills no promise whatsoever. It employs snap-beats and paint-by-numbers lyrics for typical 2019 mainstream country radio fodder. It’s background music. The chorus has lyrics nearly identical to several other pop-country songs (including the one above), as I illustrated in a meme last month. Come to think of it, “country” songs are basically just memes now. Take a format and make slight changes to it and pass it around. As Public Enemy once poignantly asked “Who stole the soul?” This one’s catchier than Chris Lane’s nearly identical song and Jimmie has a better voice, so I’ll give it a
D

Luke Bryan - Knockin’ Boots
The good: Simple instrumentation, no clutter. The bad: Everything else. Who thought it was a good idea to bring back a bit of 90s slang that only stuck around for 3-4 years and a couple of hit songs from Candyman and H-Town, anyway? That’s wack yo. Circling back around to the simplicity of this song - the lyrics are also simple, but the definition of ‘simple’ that means stupid. I can’t stand repetitive nonsense… boots need knockin’, knockin’ boots… I feel stupid typing that, imagine singing it, imagine enjoying someone singing it. 
F

Jul 13, 2018

Mainstream Country Station Accidentally Plays Good Song

Note: This story was blatantly ripped off from Babylon Bee and adapted for country radio.

SOUTHAVEN, MS—Representatives for local mainstream country radio station WFNN 99.1 "Mighty Fine Ninety-Nine" issued an official apology Thursday morning after accidentally playing a good song on their station. An employee error reportedly caused the not awful song to be played in full.

“There’s no excuse, and we apologize,” a station representative said. “We meant to play another vapid pop song with a fiddle hidden in there so deep you'd need a stethoscope to hear it, and somehow a song with deep themes, country instrumentation, and solid musical execution just was slipped into the queue by a now former employee.”

Horrified listeners reportedly phoned in poorly though-out and nearly incomprehensible complaints throughout the morning.

“I relies on Mighty Fine 99 to play Luke Bryan at least twice hourly so I can make it through my hard morning of posting Alex Jones videos and racist memes on Facebook,” one local woman told reporters. “And they p**sed me off... because of that twangy noise song, they only played Luke eleventeen times today. I'm switching over to Bro-Country 102 if this s**t continues.”

"I accidentally heard a steel guitar and felt an emotion, despite being on high doses of feeling reducer pills," said Jonny Latham of Olive Branch. "That Stapleton dude sang a few three syllable words and made me feels intelligently inadequate." 

The network’s leadership assured its disgruntled listener base it wouldn’t happen again.

“I’ve personally gone in and purged every Miranda Lambert, Jon Pardi, and Chris Stapleton song from our system and instructed our content managers to only play mind-numbing, formulaic hits based on our data metrics going forward,” 99.1's program director said. “And as a special thank you to listeners for sticking with us, I’m happy to announce we’ll be playing only "Downtown's Dead" and "Heaven" for six straight hours Sunday afternoon." 


Apr 24, 2018

Borrowed Jokes: Conway, Pardi, Joe Diffie, Keith Urban

Music memes from around the webz; credited when possible.




"Pardi B"
From Brothers Osborne's Twitter account.

From @simcardcottam

From Country Music Memes 

From We Hate Pop Country

Jun 28, 2017

Single Review: Jon Pardi "Heartache on the Dancefloor"

by Jonny Brick

There’s a movement in country called, to me, ‘Boy Deserving Success Gets Success’. Aaron Watson, country’s ‘underdog’, has hit the sales top 50 and the airplay top 40 with "Outta Style;" William Michael Morgan has gone "Missing" with a sound that uncorks the bottle of wine labelled ‘1994;’ Jason Isbell has the number one record in country with zero airplay on non-satellite stations; and Jon Pardi is going to score his third number one with his smart new single, "Heartache on the Dancefloor."

It’s about a girl who attracts the protagonist with her moves on the dancefloor but who disappears before she can be found. There are about eight great rhythmic earworms in this song, including the chant-along ‘moving through my mind’ and the post-chorus ‘yes she is, yes she is’, which becomes ‘where you at, where you at’ in the final iteration.

The setting is a bar in a ‘west coast town’, which is smart as Jon is a Western act rather than a country one (the record is California Sunrise). The use of the word ‘wandering/ wondering’ in the chorus is smart: Jon is both walking to find her, and thinking about the girl constantly. ‘That girl is killing me so I put on this song!’ he says of his attempts to catch her in that same bar night after night. So what Jon is doing is describing imaginary heartache, which comes from not even talking to a girl; it’s sort of a psychic (or psychotic) passion for a girl. Maybe he dreamed her…

The image is instantly identifiable to anyone who ever visited a bar and saw a purty lady on the dancefloor. This time, Jon doesn’t even need to mention boots to get a hit.

7/10

May 26, 2017

My Name is Earl Country Reaction Gifs

What is your analysis of the lyrics of the new Dylan Scott song?

 What it feels like to listen to mainstream country radio...

I know you like Jon Pardi. He's touring with Luke Bryan.
Wanna go?

 How do you feel about Kelsea Ballerini?

When you catch your kids listening to The Chainsmokers

Sturgill Simpson is opening for Guns n' Roses???

Should I be embarrassed to have a favorite FGL song?

Aug 11, 2016

The Current Poop of Mainstream Country Music

A ratings system based on poop emojis seems right in our wheelhouse, so here you go. This is the current Mediabase Top 20 country songs. Poop is bad. Not-Poop is good. The potential worst rating is 5 poop emojis. The potential best is 5 not-poop emojis. Here's Trailer's opinion of each song. Enjoy!     (...?)


The inaugural Poop Rating of the Mediabase Top 20 is 5 POOP EMOJIS (or -5) overall. Please read Country Perspective's Current Pulse for a different perspective, more class, and better insight.

Chart from Country Aircheck / Mediabase.

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