Showing posts with label Nelly. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Nelly. Show all posts

Sep 9, 2021

Steve Martin Country Reaction Gifs

When you let your dad hear what mainstream country radio sounds like these days

About to watch a Ward Davis video

You a Lonestar fan?

Me trying to get away from Walker Hayes' "Fancy Like"

Still listening to Sturgill's "Played Out" 3 weeks later

Still more country than Sam Hunt

Hey man, you like bluegrass and getting high?

Florida-Georgia Line hanging out with Nelly

Who makes better country, Texas or Oklahoma?
Texas: "We do"
Oklahoma:


Jul 13, 2021

Couldn't, Shouldn't



*Yes, I know those songs on the bottom row are not considered by most of Farce the Music's
readers to be actually country, but memes have to be pithy.

Jun 17, 2021

Wrasslin' Country Reaction Gifs #51

♫ When the gun smoke settles we'll sing a victory tune
And we'll all meet back at the local saloon 

So, how was the bluegrass festival this weekend?

When somebody says they have an extra ticket for the Kane Brown show and wonders if you'd like to go

When somebody on MY Facebook page says country music is dead

♫ I wish I was a square so I'd stop coming back around 

Every time country radio takes a step forward (Carly Pearce, Midland), it takes 2 steps back (Niko Moon, Nelly, Tik Tok singers)

Me when the fake drums start on a "country song"

Typical female country singer radio station visit

Jerk musician to his merch guy before the show:

Nov 6, 2020

Report: Nelly Has Blackmail Photos of Florida-Georgia Line

An anonymous source the in the camp of pop-country duo Florida-Georgia Line says the extended relevance of Nelly has more to do with some leverage he owns rather than public demand. 

Nelly, born Cornell Iral Haynes Jr., was last on top of the charts in the early to mid 2000s, but has seen a resurgence in his career thanks to country music, and in particular Florida-Georgia Line. Their first collaboration was a remix of the smash “Cruise” which went on to become one of the biggest hits of the decade in any genre. 


After than, many expected for Nelly to fade into the background and go back to doing club shows and the occasional rap album, but that has not been the case. FGL has collaborated with Nelly and brought him on several big tours long after the hype for “Cruise” died down, and it left many scratching their heads. When Nelly put out his own recent song featuring FGL, we had to do a little digging. 


According to our inside source (nicknamed “Benny”) Nelly, performer of such hits as “Pimp Juice” and “Hot in Herre,” has possession of several photographs that keep Tyler Hubbard and Brian Kelley at his beck and call. He’s made such requests of them as songwriting sessions, car detailings, tour slots, and their Netflix passwords. 


“They are willing to do just about anything to keep Nelly from publishing those pics,” said Benny. “I honestly don’t know what the photos are of, but it must be some seedy sh*t!” Benny also said that Nelly carries the photos with him in a Halliburton briefcase attached to his wrist with handcuffs, and is never more than 5 feet from the case. 


“Not to demean him because he’s had a good career, but that briefcase keeps him in steak and lobster and Bugattis,” laughed Benny. “And he’s also just showing up at their houses at all hours of the night to just hang out… their wives aren’t crazy about it but the guys just tell them they’re working on music, but they’re just shooting pool in the treehouse.” 


When asked to guess what’s in the photos, Benny ventures a few possibilities. “I doubt it’s anything sexual, those dudes never had any game until they were rich and then they got married immediately, so it’s probably pics of them at a real country concert, enjoying themselves. That would devastate Florida-Georgia Line fans!”


At press time, Nelly was taking a shower with one arm through the curtain.


Jan 21, 2020

Carl Outlaw, Real Country Fan, Reviews Tim McGraw’s “Way Down”




I don’t know what to say about this one. Mostly because I didn’t listen to it. The day I listen to a Tom McGraw song is the day I neuter myself with a spork. He’s pretty much Luke Bryan’s dad. Their’s no difference between them accept one of them is tan and skinny and the other one wears leggings. Or so I’ve heard - I never heard one note of a Luke Bryan song either.


Tom McGraw did a rap song with Nelly one time so you know he’s a wannabe loser. Country plus rap equals crap, in case you forgot. He also did a song about wearing buffalo underwear. What the f*** man? I don’t want to think about some dude in his underpants. The only good thing Tom McGraw ever did in his life is Faith Hill.


Now, this song. I read the lyrics and it’s pretty much just a geography lesson. He just says a state and then some crap that state is known for. Your and idiot if you learn anything from this song because its just stuff every body already knows. Impress me if your gonna list southern shit. Talk about Hot Stuff Eddie Gilbert and talk about Bucksnort, TN and talk about fried chicken gizzards. Nobody wants to here the four thousandth song with Big-D (I bet Tom likes [removed by editor]) and Ole Miss and grandma. 

Tom McGraw and his buddy Chesney are the god fathers of bro-country and this song just proves it. Just naming a bunch of country shit and having hip-hop beats. If this is a country song, Jeffrey Epstein killed himself. 


And don’t get me started on the chorus. Get this its just “way down.” That’s it but he sings it over and over until you want to drive to Tom’s house and slap him so hard that stupid shiny hat flies into his foyer. Their’s a rapper in this song to. It’s like McGraw thought to himself “what can I do to piss off Carl Outlaw so much he has to go back on blood pressure meds?” Well, good job Tom.

In closing, I’ll just say kiss every square inch of my ass, Tom McGraw, and you owe me 39 dollars for the Cardizem.


Aug 14, 2018

The Secret to Rockers Going Country

These pop and rock artists could have had more success 
in the country world with these subtle lyrical changes.








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