Better Go to Heaven

The Crud Report: September 2021 (Yeah, it's early)

 Yeah, it's a few days early. I'm ready for summer to hurry up and get out of here.

If I Don't Tell You I'm Country

 If I Don’t Tell You I’m Country

©2021 FTM Satire Lyrics

I’m from backside of the backwoods

Drive a step-side and it rides good

I got a hot chick and a cold one

Wanna talk big, we can go, son

But the beat snaps and the bass drops

And I speak slang, hey is this pop?

Chorus

If I don’t tell you I’m country

That I like my beer real cold

If I don’t mention my hometown

And the bonfires don’t glow

You might think you’re cranking Bieber

These boots are just for show

So if I don’t tell you I’m country

How are you gonna know?

Dress in fashion, I got a stylist

Check out my hair man, it’s the wildest

I go huntin’ but it’s guided

And yeah I work hard, exercisin’

Ain’t no fiddle, and I don’t twang

And there’s some tuner when I sang

So if I don’t tell you I’m country

That I like my beer real cold

If I don’t mention a pasture

And the bonfires don’t glow

You might think I’m Ed Sheeran

These jeans are just for show

So if I don’t tell you I’m country

How are you gonna know?

Bridge

Yeah that first verse was a big lie

I was born out in Granny White

If I don’t tell you I’m country

That I like my beer real cold

If I don’t mention my hometown

And the bonfires don’t glow

You might think you’re cranking Bieber

These boots are just for show

So if I don’t tell you I’m country

How are you gonna know?

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